Local Chinese resident, Hin Ming Pul, was very disappointed when she went to the Water Cube building in downtown Beijing for the Chinese New Year today. Apparently she arrived a few weeks too early for the festivities. Continue Reading »

Giving money to Afghan  warlords worked during the early stages of the invasion but now these tactics are showing little effect. However the clever US Generals have come up with a new solution to win over the Taliban using a new form of “blue” currency.

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DECEMBER 23 - Chief’s Big DAY–A Massachusetts boy, 12, was arrested Tuesday morning after his mother called police to report that he had unwrapped a Christmas present without her permission.

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Yesterday I attended the Patriots dismantling of the Arizona Cardinals. However the real comedy came when we were leaving the parking lot and a disgruntled pats fan got pissed at my driver (Prymus Sucks). These two idiots employed by Patriot Chimney Sweep, which I know because they were driving the company truck, tried to fight us because we cut them off. Although the event ended with the guy hitting Prymus’s driver side window with his fist it didn’t comedicly unfold like the clip below.

Bjursas Ski Center, Sweden - As many as 70 skiers, who were on a school field trip, got sick after ingesting snow that was laced with LSD. Investigators have narrowed down the potential suspects to high school pranksters or ski instructor Timothy Leary Jr.

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Wilco/Neil Young

DCU Center, Worcester

December 13, 2008

Cast of Characters: Middle aged couples, Parent/children duos, Packs of seriously intoxicated 30-something-year-old men

Popular Drinks: I couldn’t find anything other than Miller Lite for purchase at the DCU Center, but recommend drinking 22 oz. “Blockbuster” beers at the 99 Restaurant beforehand

Amenities: Feedback solos

Suggested accessories: plaid flannel shirt

My dad and I go see Neil Young together whenever he comes to town, a tradition that started with my mom’s refusal to sit through a concert whose art direction is asserted through feedback solos. Very impressed by the Wilco/Neil co-bill, not so impressed by the price or its location in the Worcester Cultural District, I bought a pair of tickets for us that doubled as my dad’s Christmas gift. After a couple of Blockbusters and turkey clubs at the 99 and much bonding with our neighbors at the bar, we jogged through icy winds to catch the Wilco set (apparently there was a deadly ice storm in Worcester earlier that day?). We somehow missed the first couple of songs, and at first, I could not confirm whether we were watching Wilco or the other opening band until Jeff Tweedy hit his first telling feedback jam, imitating in the best possible way the legend who’d be appearing onstage later. From the driving krautrock beat of Spiders to the poignant Jesus Inc. to songs that made them sound like a raucous bar band, Wilco played an energized set that had my neighbors asking me for the name of this “local band” and my dad asking if I could burn him some of their albums.

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Mouth Sewn Shut

All Asia Café

December 11, 2008

Cast of Characters: All Caucasians

Popular Drinks: PBR draughts

Amenities: Free Merlinmoon digital download cards!

Suggested accessories: handlebar mustache, earplugs 

I’ve lived in the Central Square vicinity for three years, but had never once ventured into All Asia Café until last week. Comparing Central’s music venues to cheeseburger establishments (why not), the Middle East is like R.F. O’Sullivans- a reliably good neighborhood spot with no pretension and generous proportions of solid local flavor. TT the Bears could be compared to Charlie’s Kitchen- cheeseburgers of a questionable quality but cheapness and a sense of nostalgia continue draw me in. All Asia- perhaps a free cheeseburger distributed in the YMCA cafeteria or something served at the Cantab? Buoyed by a free bottle of champagne at the Middle East (I can admit my bias), our crew ventured out in the pouring rain to see our friends’ band, Mouth Sewn Shut, at All Asia last week. I was expecting some sort of Asian theme to the place, and was hopeful about the presence of mai tais, but was met instead by a regular sort of dive bar with a bartender from the cast of Trainspotting serving up PBRs. Rather than some sort of violent dancing to accompany the music of a band called TheMurder, we were treated to some Bollywood style hands-in-the-air, head-to-the-sky moves by a middle aged gentleman and a small but dedicated fan base yelling the words to every song. As I told the young bartender who asked me to return to visit him during his Saturday shift, I’m not sure when I’ll next return to All Asia; I was both disappointed and relieved by the lack of violent grubbiness I’d expected.