DontPry’s birth comes from a rather curious fellow who likes to tell stories more than he likes to verify them, but in truth, this site is a Reaction to our place in time rather than a half-baked critique.No, my colleague Seamus Prior does not want you to Pry when he tells you about the “inevitable extinction of bananas” because he’s not sure it’s actually true. But, the real point, is that in our era of instant information, perhaps we have become only facts and no substance; perhaps some of us know a lot about food but not how to cook; where we fought WW II but not why, and as we push on through this digital age, it is our job to remind the world that it is no use to swallow a berry and look for its seed in a pile of shit.

Perhaps in a linguistic wrinkle, we are actually taunting you to pry–to not just read our headlines and jokes but actually dig through the substance and figure something out on your own for once. We live in a world that believes too much in itself. We live a life that feels completed by a computer and bank account. The answer for humanity is not in the wild forest, or in the dim words of our former geniuses. The answer is in our own will to keep thinking independent of the whim of the world.

So when you, dear reader, peruse this website, do not expect the preening and bragging of second rate writers trying to become the next Hemingway, or worse, the next ‘revolutionary columnist’ writing dirty words and unprintable stories that Esquire wouldn’t use for a cocktail napkin.

What you will find on this site is a friendly hand willing to escort you through the loud and stubborn city, through layers of comedy that are in essence a remedy we invented to cope with a sad world. Here you will find the physical manifestation of friendship, you will see what matters to the kids of the city, and to the new boomers and their exhausted world. Here you will read about a world that is too modern for its countless traditions, yet too proud to let them go.

This is a world where a joke and a cruel tale are separated by a play on words, and where the real challenge is not to make money, to live long, to go far, but rather to understand the good advice and paranoid science of our previous million years. We are never far from the Big Bang. It is the simple little cross that sits between 1 + 1 = us.

Cheers,

Marquis de Birds Hill, J. Paul Lontenz